Out in Left-Centre Field

Did anyone else feel that magnitude 5.0 earthquake yesterday afternoon?

I work on the fifth floor of an office building in in Etobicoke (i.e. western Toronto), Ontario, where I was at my desk doing some estimations for a series of dams that one engineer had to choose between for a tailings pond out at a mine in Newfoundland.

It felt alternately like a strong wind was buffeting the building or somebody was doing some rather rough erasing on paper in an adjacent cubicle. Then I felt the vibration through the floor ... and I finally clued in (along with most of my coworkers) as to what it was. It lasted a good 30 seconds or more too.

What made it briefly disconcerting was that two black military helicopters chose that very minute to fly by farther south near the lake shore. Yay for the G20 effect! Which brings me to my next point ...

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Toronto police, earlier today, arrested a man sitting but a few blocks away from the big ol' G20 convention centre.

This sounds unremarkable until you realize that he was packing a crossbow, chainsaw, sledgehammer, four baseball bats, and a collection of fuel canisters! Any bets on what that could do if used to its full potential?

Seriously, you have to be a complete idiot to pack that kind of weaponry in public when you are in the midst of a city swarming with thousands of police officers -- no matter what you really intended to do with it.

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Oh, you wanted something political? Okay then.

I know I'm an NDP supporter (not a member; I don't intend to be), and I know I don't agree with all the actions that the state of Israel takes, and I think the critics are overreacting in calling for her outright resignation/removal, but Jack Layton's response to Libby Davies' comments on Israel's "occupation" of Palestine is highly inadequate.

Sure, I'm glad she backtracked and apologized. Sure, people have a right to criticize Israel like any other legitimate state -- its most fervent proponents need to stop hiding behind the hybrid shield of the Holocaust and anti-Semitism finger-pointing. Sure, it's impossible to stop all criticisms from sliding down the proverbial slippery slope into idiocy.

However, it is not enough to let someone get away with calling a sovereign state effectively illegitimate with hardly a tap on the wrist. We wouldn't like anyone calling Canada an "occupation" of First Nations land, would we? (Though, from some points of view, that's basically what the French and British did.) Did we forget the Golden Rule? Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Just like Nova Scotia's Darrell Dexter should have forcefully called the local unions on the carpet for throwing the NS NDP into disrepute by trying to circumvent election financing limitations, so should Jack Layton have publicly and visibly chastised Ms. Davies for her actions, which have done a whole lot to reinvigorate the tired old -- and hopefully baseless -- idea that the NDP and leftists in general are "anti-Israel". (Newsflash: we aren't.)

While Mr. Layton is usually a highly adept party leader, his failure to take a strong stance in drawing the line between acceptable criticism and unacceptable criticism is but the latest in a series of questionable decisions that has me wondering whether that perception is true.

Y'know, I hate making myself a hypocrite.

Last time I wrote on here, if you, dear reader, might recall, I ragged on the CYA for falling down a slippery slope of inactivity. Long story short, I did my level best to excoriate (1) the CYA parties for not pulling together, (2) the CYA membership for fighting inactivity with more inactivity, and (3) the subordinate members of the CYA staff/volunteers for failing to take the lead in engaging the members. I called out others for, as I saw it, not pulling their weight.

So what did I promptly do, then? I went and left this blog alone for more than four freakin' months. Kinda long for anyone who might claim to have a burning desire to light a fire under this assembly's rear end, don't you think?

I left this blog alone, I left my party alone, I damn near left the CYA forums alone, and even though I could hide behind the excuse of being a third-year engineering student with a crippling amount of coursework, I won't.

Why? Because people other than myself have dedicated far more of their time and effort to the causes of their choosing. I have been, and still am, too stuck in having "time to myself" to be as dedicated as many people who I see around me. I need to get out of that comfort zone, but try as I might, my successes in doing so have only ever been temporary things.

I have no moral grounds on which to criticize others if I'm not willing to sacrifice the time myself. Sure, I've been with the CYA a long time, and sure, I've helped with some key things in the past (like the 177 ridings I should be writing about), but if I'm failing to motivate myself now, what gives me the right to rip others for doing the same?

I am weak. Is that what makes me human? Or is it what makes me a lousy one?

Call it an apology, call it a mea culpa, call it the inane ramblings of a despairing mind, call it whatever you wish. I have been a lousy asset to the CYA and to my party (or what's left of it), and I'm sorry. Sorry that I've let people down; sorry that I didn't do better when I readily could have; sorry that I never delivered on the potential of the past.

But then, what did you expect? Perfection? Because if perfection's what you're waiting for, don't hold your breath.

We're all flawed. We get angry, jealous, lazy, greedy, vain, lustful and wasteful. At the same time, we can all be great people to one another in spite of whatever may stand between us. We are capable both of great achievements and great failures. What we need to do, then, is pick ourselves up, bite the proverbial bullet and do what needs to be done to succeed and to go beyond our limits.

Let's get out there, and let's help the CYA kick some ass. Together.

- Adam S.